Friday, May 04, 2007
Ahhh. the hardest part of the examinations are finally over. Well the remaining rest of the exams cant really be described to its full potential, the closest I got was OMFGWTF! Yes having an examination on the topic of moral education for Barker boys is not a very bright idea. At least they tried, I'll give them that. And then there is Design & Technology, having a paper test on how to destroy the earth is.... Well kinda weird actually but I guess carpenters-to-be take their ply-wood seriously.
The Mario Theory
You know the thing where Mario bonks his head onto a box and a magical mushroom pops out, starts running around the room and also makes Mario taller? Well I'm guessing thats a high-mushroom pumped with high-quality cocaine. You see, it gets Mario high with the sense of invicibility and with his new found powers, Mario runs around beating up innocents like Goombas and the Mafia Lord Browser and once again saves the princesses life ( How the hell did she get captured so many times?)
I'm sure If you have a sad life following the Mario story line, I'm betting you must have encountered the feather. This mystical relic falls from the heavens in times of crisis enchanting Mario a power to soar like an eagle over enemy lines. But wait, there is one catch, your wearing a raccoon suite. The Gods of Mario land must have gone :
MarioGod1: "Mario requires our aid!"
MarioGod2: "Indeed, I shall imbune a feather to bestow powers of an eagle to the person who carries it. Then I shall drop it from the heavens in times of need."
MarioGod1: "Marvelous plan, why not turn the user into a raccoon while we are at it?"
MarioGod2: "Brilliant! I'll get started right away!"
Either that or
Fusajiro Yamauchi (who is the founder of Nintendo by the way) has a secret raccoon fetish.
And then there are the villains which look like they were designed by a crack addict. Lets take Thwomp for instance, you've guessed it, thwomp is a giant brick, I'm not shitting you. The Thwomp is a giant brick that basically drops with the sound of THWOMP! Two major flaws of creativity, firstly, its named after the one and only sound the character makes. Two its a giant stone brick with faces on ever side, not only that after it 'Thwomps' once its over, its just sits there looking and looking and looking........ I'm sure they serve pretty good crack at Nintendos creativity department, where the taps have three different settings, cold, hot and crack. Ahh don't we just love the Japanese?
